Resilience

The last 3 months have been a huge test of my ability to figure things out. That's what resilience is to me - being able to reach into my toolbox of experiences and lessons and either use them, or build on them for whatever challenge I'm facing.

On March 4, my sweet 6 yr old niece and nephew came to live with me through kinship care. R has Down Syndrome which was an extra curve ball. My kids are all adults, so this was a huge decision and change for me. Actually, it wasn't a huge decision. It was an easy decision - because they're kids and don't deserve to go through more than they already have. But it was impactful.

My tool: I've parented alone before and I can do this again.

What I didn't know was coming: no access to school or childcare for an entire month

The next week I had 5 days of in-school programs to deliver in Grande Prairie.

My tool: Ask for help fast. I asked my family first and between my brother, my sister and two of my kids, they managed to keep G and R fed, safe and happy at my home so they didn't have to be disrupted again.

The kids didn't get into school until the beginning of April. R didn't sleep at night and G had a lot of behavioural stuff going on. I was exhausted, working when I could, and missing my work like crazy because I love what I do. I also missed my own kids and didn't go to the gym, which was brutal on my mental health.

My tool: A mindset of "This isn't forever. This will pass. You've done harder things." Communicating my needs fast. I reached out to my board and team, let them know what was up and they fully backed me while I sorted it out.

Then there was the onslaught of family services requirements. Video calls 5 days a week. Supervised visits. So much driving. So much disruption. Very little care for the kids' experience or needs.

My tool: Advocacy for the kids. Speak up. Say no.

At RRDRJ we'd been working on a huge project - the Restorative School Culture Program & after working hard on the grant application we learned it was a go in late March. Which meant a ton more work - but work that I really wanted to do!

My tool: Boundaries. Self advocacy. Planning. Time management. Releasing the outcome. Team work. Collaboration. And a work ethic that meant I did whatever I had to.

A bunch of other stuff too. My home was meant for me to empty nest. I had to find a bigger home - we're moving in 9 days. My finances were dependent on out-of-town work in schools & I had to turn away bookings because of child care challenges - but I got a raise and increased hours at RRDRJ to balance it out. Annual reports due. New case files. Meetings. Training. Trips. Babysitters ghosting constantly. Inability to get the kids into Out of School Care. A strong desire to make sure that I was fully present and the primary healthy attachment for these sweeties.

I don't think anything is impossible. I'm proud of what I'm capable of and what I've accomplished in the last 3 months despite my entire world being turned upside down.

Resilient.